Turning Point on this Walk with Dad

In walking with dad on that journey, I reached a turning point one evening as I rode the train home from work. It was there in the midst of the standing room only train that I looked up and realized that I was not alone. That sitting there, I was surrounded by others that either had experienced it, were in the middle of experiencing it, or yet to experience it. It seemed obvious, but this was the cycle of life. I mean, we all someday will pass on and for some reason that night on that train it struck me. In this, I found a deeper resolve and peace with moving toward what was then inevitable...the loss of my father.

Barring a miracle...he was never to be the same again. The stroke pretty much made sure of that.

So, in this...how can we walk this journey with any sort of peace? I mean, saying goodbye is not an easy thing to do or watching someone deteriorate so quickly...it's a brutal visual and happens so quick, it's hard to often catch your breath. One moment they seem fine and the next...well...not so fine and never the same again.

For me, I found my resolve, strength, and peace in the midst of running on pure adrenaline in the word of God. It sometimes felt like I was running a race on a treadmill where I couldn't get off. But, it was there in the midst of that experience that I found the strength to walk on. What were my options anyway?

Life always walks on and perhaps I too will find myself on the train home one night as another passenger looks up to survey the crowd pondering the same question. Perhaps in this, I may find myself sitting next to that passenger and who knows...maybe I can be used in that instance to join their walk...even if it is only to that next stop, we all need a friend sometimes. And in this...maybe just maybe, we can offer the comfort that only Christ can offer by placing our arm around them. With this, perhaps they will know that they are not alone and from here on out...we walk together!

Though I do not remember any of the faces from that train ride home, I do carry that image and memory with me often for it was then where I too realized that I was not alone, it's ok, and it was ok to walk on. It's part of life and it was then that I realized that it was my turn. Of course, not in a sort of way that I walk on and right pass my dad. But moreafter...this is life...experience it and make your moments make a difference. I was one of the blessed ones...I had one opportunity to walk with my dad through this. Many people unfortunately do not have that opportunity. But, for me...I was blessed and I did not want to miss it. For we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil...for He is with me.

Now sure, I had Christ in my life and sure I was seeking His word daily to somehow grasp the magnitude of this season I was facing. But, sometimes it takes experiences like this for Christ to remind us of His faithfulness and the reality of the journey we face. It's funny, I don't even know what exactly it was about that night on the train...but one thing was for sure...Jesus was there.